Stop Reading Blogs That Make You Feel Bad


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   Blogs are for me a way of peeking into the lives of people I admire and in some ways want to emulate. You know, in real life there is that girl with the amazing sense of style and DIY jewellery, all those people with gorgeous homes, those effortlessly organised people, and the ones who are doing all the interesting stuff -- you'd love to look over their shoulders and pick up a thing or two. Well, on the internet you can!  It's called the blogosphere.
    If it weren't for the internet I'd probably be much worse dressed, my skin and hair would be a mess, my house would be a bigger chaos than it is, and I'd be walking around in some very badly fitting bras. I still sometimes can't fathom that people share so much wisdom online, free and open for everybody.
    However, for all the awesomeness of the blogosphere, I noticed that some blogs would leave me feeling bad. I'd feel that my apartment is too small, that I can't afford anything, and that my body is all wrong. After mulling on it for a while, I noticed several categories of bloggers making me feel this way: the ones with money / a model figure / a huge house / household help; who sound oblivious that this is not the way most people live (that, or they are actually writing for others like them). And then there are the pretenders / aspirators, who feature expensive products (that they are probably paid to promote), seemingly "forgetting" that regular people aren't going to spend a couple of hundred bucks on a moisturiser or a throw rug, or whatever. Or maybe they are using their credit card to afford designer items, but scrimping on food, education, travel and other aspects of life (and getting into debt).
   It's not always the fault of the blog that I feel discontent. For example I never read travel blogs, because my wanderlust wakes and becomes an almost physical ache in my heart. Not the blog's fault. Same goes for big home blogs.
  Do you know that people with an average income who live in richer neighbourhoods feel worse about their life that those living in a neighbourhood of people with similar salaries? I decided to "move out" of the rich neighbourhood, at least on the blogosphere.

    My point is not that it is wrong to be rich or thin,  however I don't like it if the writer automatically assumes that that is the norm. I am trying to be sensitive about this in my writing: yes, I did buy a 30€ sunscreen but I tried to communicate that this is not what I would usually spend on a cosmetic item, or that you have to spend this kind of money on a product. And that it is ok to buy your bras second-hand. I know I'm still not all the way there when it comes to writing in a body-positive and indiscriminating way, but I am trying to get there.

     Anyway, back to the rest of the blogosphere. I decided to stop reading blogs that made me feel inadequate. Basically, if a blog made me feel discontent instead  content, it went. I'd like to share my process with you.

Here is how I uncluttered my RSS reader from negativity:

* I got rid of lifestyle blogs who make me feel poor, that insinuated that I must $pend to be awesome. Goodbye A Cup Of Jo, Gala Darling (although I might pop over to GD just for the link round-ups). Who stays: Yes And Yes, Sarah Wilson -- thanks for keeping things real.
* Also, most of the interior design blogs -- why can't they every feature affordable stuff? I also said goodbye to interior blogs from US suburbs, these seem to assume that everyone has a gigantic house and the time to line the inner sides of cupboards with pretty paper. I've already uncluttered this category last month, and I don't remember the blog titles any more. I only remember Happy Interior Blog. Who stays: Chez Larsson, Decor8, Unclutterer.
* Blogs with multiple posts a day. Too much pressure to keep up. Goodbye Apartment Therapy, I did love you but it's just too much. Also Mystic Medusa (also I wish you wrote in plain English).
* Since a long time I have not subscribed to any style blog that made me feel fat, pressured me to wear heels or buy expensive stuff. I did love A Sea Of Shoes and Fashion Toast, but it made me feel that I can't be stylish without $pending. For this reason I don't follow those street-style blogs who mostly photograph people in the fashion industry wearing expen$ive stuff (sorry Sartorialist). Who stays: Already Pretty, Lost In A Spotless Mind, Style Is A Language.
* Obviously, no beauty blogs where price = quality. Price does not guarantee that a product will work, or that it is non toxic (in fact luxury cosmetics are often highly toxic according to Cosmetic database and Öko test). Again no names here, since I've uncluttered this category years ago.
* Funnily, I found a car manual blog among my feeds. I have never owned a car.

  I'm not boycotting these blogs or anything, I might visit them in the future or link to them, however they will not be a part of my daily blog round. I also have a tab on my RSS reader called "rarely read", where I move blogs that I feel reluctant to completely remove. If I miss the blog, I can always bring it back.

    My point is: the lives of bloggers are not what you see on blogs. Also, do not read anything that gets you down and makes you dislike your life. Same goes for people.

   I was wondering if there is a word or expression for mentioning expensive stuff as if it were normal for everybody to afford it?

   Do you declutter your blog subscriptions? What are your favourite blogs that make you feel inspired and content?




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